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things I've been doing instead of updating my blog

Can I even really call this a blog?

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1. Worked like a crazy person.

2. Put together Tori's new bed. Isn't it great?

3. The headboard with the shelves was the hardest part.

3. But then we couldn't hook in the side slats.

4. There may have been some yelling.

5. Threw up our hands and gave up for a few days because it was late and Tori's BFF was over.

6. The next day after the BFF had gone home, we tried again. Realized why we paid $50 from someone on Craigslist for what we thought was a truly "new in box" bed but clearly was actually a "we can't fucking figure this shit out, so get it away from us" purchase.

7. The moment we realized this, the heavy headboard with all the pretty shelves tipped over.

8. Somehow, and I'm not fucking sure how exactly, the bottom edge dragged across the top of my left foot. Much blood. Much spurting. Two inch v-shaped cut in my foot. Much yelling of the word HOSPITAL.

9. I ran to the bathroom to get said spurting in a contained space. Charlie is all, "What, how bad could it be?" while Tori was hysterical. I ran water over the cut and nearly passed out, but then heard Tori sobbing and flipped on the Extra Mom Switch and hollered, "Honey, it's okay, I'll be fine" as blood spurted into the tub.

10. Sent Charlie for paper towels and sent Tori to get a long sock. Improvised a bandage.

11. Went to Emergency Room. Got x-rayed. Spent a good half hour worrying as the doctors tried to figure out if the foot was broken but it turned out I just have extra sesamoid bones BECAUSE NOTHING IN MY BODY CAN BE FUCKING NORMAL.

12. Got five stitches (warning: that's a photo of my stitches because I'm a ghoul). First stitches ever, WOOT.

13. Worked a fuckton more hours.

14. Had a Thanksgiving dinner that couldn't be beat with all the family at our friends A & E, otherwise known as the parents of the BFF.

15. Put together this adorable trashcan (I know, right?) I found on Amazon when I searched for what I thought would be impossible to find: "yellow wooden kitchen trashcan."

How are you?

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